Oh! For the Love....

The space in my closet where my vacuum USED to live!

“Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure.” – Helen Keller

On December 17, 2009, we were robbed.

Yep, sure enough, in the middle of the day, one week before Christmas, we became one of the thousands of families every year that experience a home invasion.

Invasion is such a perfect word to describe that break in because the thieves didn’t really take anything of real value. (Not that we really own anything of real value cause all of our stuff is just that- stuff.) But you can’t ever retrieve that feeling of security once it is gone. It makes me angry. I have worked hard to make a sure that my family feels safe, particularly in our own home. I understand that safety is just a perception. That it is not reality. But the thought that someone destroyed that perception for my children enrages me.

That is exactly how I felt that night…enraged. My husband kept saying (in front of the policeman no less) “I’m just glad you weren’t home. You would have killed them.” It’s true…I believe I could have hurt someone pretty badly in those moments. Mama was NOT happy!

As we walked about trying to determine what all was missing, Xander discovered his GameCube had been taken (along with the Wii and the PS2). I watched as the emotions flickered across his face: first, anger; then , disappointment; and then, in a flash….compassion.

That’s right. Compassion. In that moment I was so proud of my son and so ashamed of my own heart that I could burst. He looked at me with eyes full of tears and said, “Mom, we should pray for the robbers. If they have to steal stuff for Christmas, then they must not have enough. And if they think it is ok to steal, then they must not have Jesus. That’s the worst part, Mom. We need to pray for them to find Jesus.” Wow….nothing like the child-like love of a seven year old heart to put life in perspective.

As I go through this season, I am humbled and blessed by how my children have responded and dealt with all of this, and I desperately try to hold on to the compassion and love that Xander showed that night for those thieves. It isn’t easy….especially as we are still periodically stumbling on things that are missing. But then I remember my munchkins’ hearts and how we pray for those thieves every night, and I thank God that I was blessed with an opportunity to see Christ’s love in action.

I learned so much from this experience and I am so excited to share it with you. Man, Company Girls has Home Sanctuary rocked this week or what? I am loving the focus on organizing my life and time...I feel more peaceful already! Thanks for connecting today! Oh, and make sure you head on over to www.stringsattachedministries.com to check out a great post about Jesus and the Car wash!

Watch out for flying snowballs!

Good Morning, My Coffee Friends! I don't have the tea on yet this morning, but I can offer you a bowl of fruit and some rice milk?! Come back soon, I am baking something warm and yummy this morning, I just don't know what yet!

This week? What happened this week? Not much really except that we here in the South are experiencing CRAZY COLD! Today it is -15 degrees outside...Girls, in Arkansas, it just doesn't get that cold, and frankly we are not prepared for it!

But before it got too cold to go outside we did have a beautiful snow!

Doug Larson said,"The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball."

I guess that I am still young at heart!

Xander started it! Right in the petushky!

I am out for revenge! stalking my prey!

He turned right into me! I wasn't aiming for his face, I promise!

My little angel makes the best snow angels!

The snow was too powdery to make a snowman, so the kids decided on a snow fort! The men supervise the building!

The finished product!

Wow it was cold! Warming their feet by the fire waiting for some homemade hot cocoa!

As for other stuff, because the kids have been home from school, I've been able to stay up with all of the Small Things this week! Yay! And get some work done on Strings Attached (my testimony and calendar are up as well as a first blog post)! Oh...and I had my first email newsletter sign up over at www.stringsattachedministries.com! SO excited about that! My intention this year is to give 12 Strings Attached Presentations around the country....I would love to come speak to your group!

I also resumed work on my book with a fervor and have completed another chapter! I am working through a write a book in a weekend program and am really seeing it all come together!

I guess that's all for now...I am off to make something warm and gooey....hmmm maybe some pear polenta muffins...so stay a while, roam around...I'll have it out of the oven in about an hour!

Life in the Medium Lane

The dressing room was completely empty this morning as I prepared for my morning swim. I love a calm swimming pool…a quiet dressing room…perfect morning. As I walked out of the dressing room and into the pool, a little girl inside jumped for joy. Just me! I can pick ANY lane I want! YAY!

As I looked across the pool, with it’s quietly rippling surface, the six lane lines floating unassumingly along the top of the water, I glanced at the shallow end of the lap lanes…and felt all my exhilaration fall away. There, on the deck, at the end of the pool stood the label for each lane. You know the little yellow bi-fold signs that say “Fast,” “Medium,” and “Slow?” As I scanned those signs, I could almost hear the little girl inside cry out, “Nooooo!”

See, now I can’t choose any lane I want…I have to take the lane I’m “supposed” to be in. This is my paradigm.

Now freeze frame here for a moment. Picture me, standing in front of a completely open pool, thinking to my black and white conscience, I must choose the lane I am supposed to go in…medium, I think…yeah, I am a medium swimmer. To be quite honest, I have no frame of reference for which lane I should be in. I have never had someone tap me on the shoulder and say, “You really should be in the medium lane.” But I put myself there anyway. Because somewhere in the back of my mind I have the belief that I haven’t put in the time, effort or haven’t the skill to swim in the fast lane, and thus don’t deserve to be there.

Even when no one else is in the pool with me.

The weight of this revelation and the implication in my life sat with me as I stroked my way through my workout. With each stroke, I wondered how much faster I would have to swim to be a “fast swimmer.” I wondered who would have to define that for me? Would I ever believe it of myself, without acknowledgement from an outside expert? How do I hold myself back in my life due to this same belief?

And then, a single thought entered my mind and hung there in the splish splash rhythm of my freestyle stroke…a thought striking enough that I stopped swimming.

My adult, wise self had a meeting with that little girl inside. And said something to her that I have said to my children countless times before. Wise Cari said to Baby Girl Cari-

EVERYTHING is a choice. Choosing to follow the rules is a choice. Choosing to label myself a “medium” swimmer is a choice. Choosing to get into the “medium” lane is a choice AND choosing to believe that I am not good enough and must rely on someone else to tell me that I am is a choice. Now CHOOSE to stop doubting and CHOOSE to get your butt over to the fast lane.

Which is exactly what I did. Maybe just for today, I swam in the fast lane. Tomorrow, perhaps I will swim in the medium lane again. I did find myself pushing a little harder, resting a little less and being more conscious of the technical aspects of my stroke, and I realized that, frankly, I am not sure if I WANT to swim in the “fast” lane. However, whether I want it or not is not relevant to this post. What is most important is that, regardless of whether I want to live life in the fast lane or the medium lane, or even in the slow lane, I never forget that I have the power to CHOOSE.

Company Girl Coffee 1/1/2010

Quinoa Breakfast Cake

Karina's Kitchen

Happy New Year! 2010 is so gonna rock!

My Company Girl pals, and all my other pals for that matter...THANK YOU! Thank you for encouraging me and supporting me and providing a nice swift kick in the pants every now and then, too. I am so excited about the new year I can hardly wait to get started.

But let me catch you up since my last post. I am cleaning out the cupboards today, so I have a wonderful assortment of hot teas, some vegan hot chocolate, some yummy vegan/gluten free rice crispie treats, and a little left over vegan/gluten free chocolate cake to share with you. Sorry no scones today, but stop back by cause I am making some Quinoa breakfast brownies (from Karina's Kitchen- www.glutenfreegoddess.blogspot.com- yummmmm!) a little later. So snuggle in cause I have a roller coaster ride for you today!

My last post was on the day after my birthday which was wonderful! From there our Christmas season started to roll a little downhill.

On Dec 17, someone broke into our house and stole a bunch of stuff. Nothing of terrible importance- our gaming systems (ok, my son might argue those are important)-our Wii, PS2 and GameCube, our cameras- including several rolls of film we hadn't developed yet and pics not yet downloaded from Thanksgiving, and...wait for it...our VACUUM CLEANER! Yep, robbers stole my vacuum cleaner! I cannot begin to tell you how frustrating that is...but I think that of all people, you guys would understand the frustration. Through the past couple of weeks, we have discovered other sundry items missing, but again, nothing irreplaceable. What is irreplaceable is the sense of security we had. Helen Keller said, "Security is mostly superstition. It does not exist in nature." And I know that so well...I teach personal security and self defense to women....but I am frankly angry that someone has crushed the perception of security that I have worked hard to create for my children. Anyway, this is a whole other blog post, which I will have up next week...needless to say, it was food for thought.

December 20, my family finally succumbed to the stomach virus that had been making the rounds at school. First my son, then two days later my daughter, then the next day, me...which left my poor husband for Christmas...My dear hubby spent his Christmas holiday absolutely miserable in hotel room, while we spent time with our family in central Arkansas. Unfortunately, we opted not to get separate rooms, so I got to re-experience the stomach virus the weekend after Christmas. I pray that we are all finished passing it around and that no germs survived the onslaught of Lysol and hot water that I followed my second bout with.

So that brings us to today. I have the high hopes of cleaning out my kitchen (fridge and pantry) today to start the New Year off right. As this is the first day that I am feeling human since my second battle with yucky germs, this is probably ambitious, but we will give her a go! Please excuse the mess in the kitchen...but you are welcome to help out if you would like!

As for the coming year, it is my intention (notice this is not a resolution), that I give 12 Strings Attached presentations this year....so if you know of a women's group who could use some real bonding time...get in touch with me! The site is up and filling out- my calendar will be up soon- I was shocked at how full it already is! Check it out at: www.stringsattachedministries.com . My testimony as well as what people have to say about the retreat itself are up now, and I have an email devotional you can sign up for about living life with strings attached. I super excited about all of the developments.

I have many other projects in the works, but one of the most pressing is a talk I am giving to a local mom's group about stepping away from Superwoman cape and living our lives without that expectation. I would love to know what your idea of "Supermom" is. Is it a good image? Is it an attainable one? Please feel free to comment with ideas!

Well that's all for now...I am off to put on my black eyed peas for lunch and start cleaning out my (ick) fridge! I look forward to hearing from you...oh...and check out the rest of the coffee girls over at home sanctuary and share a cup of coffee (or tea) with them!

Company Girl Coffee 12/11/09..The Passing of Another Year

I am getting older! (Notice the distinction between getting old- which is just kind of sad and getting older- which is a mark of wisdom, passage and a cause for celebration!)I am happy to say that yesterday I celebrated my 35th birthday!

Oh, Ladies, it was a wonderful birthday! One of the best yet! Full of heartwarming moments, tender hugs, MANY refrains of "Happy Birthday to you!" (sung in wide variety of keys- G, C and Off;), and lots and lots of love....Absolutely wonderful! Not at all my usual- plan a big party, have everyone over and eat lots of cake type birthday, but low key...good morning birthday hugs from my munchkins, breakfast with good friends, coffee and a new book at Borders, lunch with my dear husband, a little shopping, visiting with my business partner and the mini-stirfry, and then dinner with my family. Absolutely beautiful. My heart is overflowing with gratitude.

As for this past two weeks, much has happened.

1) My partner Kim and I are working on a new online project for moms. Look for it to debut in the next couple of weeks.

2) I have been asked to come on as a facilitator for a company called "The Peaceful Woman," which leads spiritual women's retreats in Maui - be in prayer for me about this decision- it is a huge time commitment, and I haven't fully gotten the green light from God on it yet, but am very excited about the possibility!

3) I got the dates for my summer tour with Inspired Girls, Inc. We will be doing Success Summits for young women ages 13-19 in 9 cities around the nation this summer. It is a fabulous program and I am so excited and blessed to be a part of it. Watch for more info on IG Success Summits to come soon!

4) Inspired Girls is taking 15 young women to Rio de Janeiro in July to experience International Life and Leadership Camp. I can't begin to tell you how excited I am to be a part of this camp! We will be serving in a Brazilian orphanage while focusing on several aspects of personal development for the girls. If you know a young lady who would like to apply, check out the website at www.seegirllead.com

5) Last, but not least, Strings Attached Ministries FINALLY has a home! I am so excited to share my heart with you! Please go check it out...roam around and let me know what you think! www.stringsattachedministries.wordpress.com

I love you guys! You have been such fabulous cheerleaders and supporters and I truly look forward our weekly check ins...Thank you so much! Have a great Company Girl Friday! www.homesanctuary.com